It took 30 seconds for the wave of realization to come over me as I watched the hail came down.

“No…no…noooooo!!” I quietly whispered as I stood at the bedroom window. It went on and on…gaining intensity for 8 more minutes.

I knew. I knew the large soft sunflower leaves couldn’t withstand it. I knew the tender trails of cucumber would be no more. And my heart sank.

I rushed out to the garden the second the hail stopped…with the rain still coming down. And I cried out when I saw the devastation. I walked and sobbed and touched the broken zinnias, the snapped off cosmos, the flattened squash flowers…along with all the foliage scattered about. It looked like a bomb went off. I knelt down and gathered the leaves into my arms and started making piles.

I had to cut back so much of the squash, zucchini, and pumpkins…that there wasn’t much left. The tomatoes were still standing, but they were looking defeated. The morning glories lost half of their volume across the arch and the beans are salvageable but smashed.

I’m happy to say that the flowers will make it! Many buds and blooms were lost…but many were saved too! Some of my favorite flowers that I’ve been waiting patiently for were untouched.

The irony in all of this is that we leave for a 10-day road trip to Colorado today. It was planned in the cold of winter when I just wanted to escape. And of course now that summer is here, I’ve been dreading it…vowing to never leave again during the height of garden glory.

I’ve been stressed and anxious about leaving the garden…even under the loving care of capable family members. Because…no one knows it quite like I do, and I tend to be quite particular. LOL! I even tried to hire a local flower farmer to come out and check on it…but she came down sick the morning she was supposed to come tour it.

I’ve prayed daily for months for God to bring peace and teach me how to surrender this. And yesterday, as I was getting the RV ready…I glanced out the window toward the garden and prayed again.

This time, I heard the Holy Spirit speak SO clearly.

“I don’t need any help with the garden, Sara.”

It was said in a sweet jesting tone…like when a Father gently teases his daughter when she is being silly. And when I recognized his voice…I started laughing.

Joyful, non-stop belly laughter…at the thought that the creator of the Garden of Eden (and of the entire EARTH) would be unable to watch over my small garden while I was gone. I immediately had peace. A flooding peace that brings a knowing that all is well.

A few hours after my giggle session with God, the hail hit.

I don’t know the ways of God. I don’t know why things happen the way they do. But what I DO know is God’s character.

He is trustworthy.

He is wise.

He is all-knowing.

He never changes.

He is kind.

So so kind.

And everything he does is for my GOOD. Even the hard things.

Especially the hard things that help me loosen my grip on the things of this world.

Nothing happens in my life without his divine approval. I am hidden under his wings.

“He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.”Psalm 91:4

The moment I walked into the garden after the storm…I felt God’s deep indescribable peace amidst the immense sadness. Those two emotions...existing together.

“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.”Isaiah‬ ‭26‬:‭3‬ ‭ESV‬‬

And so I leave the garden with a broken heart that is completely at peace. Instead of being worried about what might happen in the garden while I’m gone or fretting about what I will be missing…I am full of expectation to see how God will restore it. How he will bring new life.

It won’t be exactly as I planned it…but it WILL be exactly what HE planned. And that is infinitely better.